Have you ever thought about what it's like to be dumb? I know that I am not the smartest person on the planet, but sometimes you meet someone and you look into their dull vacant eyes and (as Gertrude Stein said about Oakland) you realize that there's no there there. Probably there are incredibly smart people who have the same feeling about me (yes, you know who you are -- I've seen that look). The experience must be quite common, because we have so many phrases for stupidity in the English language. Indeed, a guy named Dan Hersham has collected them and his list runs to 127 entries! Here are some of my favorites:

But he's missing one of my favorites, which we used back in Maine when I was growing up: "Only got half a cord in the woodshed." :-)

And another: "The elevator goes to the top but the doors don't open."

Peter Saint-Andre > Journal